Sunday, January 31, 2010

One Of Those Pesky Kids Gets Busted

Recently, Conservative activist/ACORN buster James O'Keefe and some cohorts were busted trying to get into Imperial Senator Mary Landrieu's office, presumably to to prove that Ol' Landfill's (I can't take credit for calling her Mary Landfill. The Great One Mark Levin came up with that one.) staff was lying about their phone system not working so they couldn't hear the thousands upon thousands of complaints they were receiving from PO'ed constituents who were up in arms about Landrieu taking bribes for her vote in the Obamacareless debate.

Well, hats off to you, Jimmy!

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not condoning breaking the law, but the truth about Mary Landfill's bribe taking must be addressed. If the FBI or the Ethics commitee in Congress aren't go to look into this, who will ? It's Mary Landrieu (and Benedict Nelson from Nebraska) who should be wearing the bracelets of justice, not O'Keefe. They committed a far more heinous crime. Now I ask you, which is the bigger crime: pretending to be a phone repairman to get access to an Imperial Senator's office to prove her dishonesty or setting the Constitution on fire by taking bribes ?

Crime and politics have always gone hand in hand. We've had countless stories from Watergate, to Dan Rostenkwoski, to James Trafficant. Oh, let's not lose sight of the undesirables Chairman Obama pals around with, like the Weather Underground jerk Bill Ayers who bombed the Pentagon. What about the dearly departed Van Jones and his relationship with convicted cop killer Mumia Abu Jamal ? Don't get me started about Bill Clinton and his Whitewater troubles, and whatever you do, don't get me started on Barney Fwank's choice of associates.

I think what O'Keefe did is a symptom of how corrupt and grotesque the system has become that citizens have to resort to stunts like this to get a morsel of truth from our elected officials. Once again, I'm forced to ask: WHERE THE HELL IS THE MEDIA OTHER THAN FOX NEWS!? WHY AREN'T THEY TRYING TO GET ANSWERS OUT OF LANDFILL OR BENEDICT NELSON!? ARE YOU $^%##ING ME ?!

Thus ends our beloved Republic....

Hide The Children! Glenn Beck Is Coming!

Recently, Roger Ailes, The Truth Czar and head honcho of Fox News, had a round table discussion with the boring Paul Krugman and the even more boring Arianna Huffington on the Sunday morning snoozefest This Week. Inevitably, in a world going to hell faster than you can say "Obama was one big mistake", the main topic was Glenn Beck.

Glenn Beck is their big worry ? We have a government that is out of control and spending every dollar not nailed down, and this is their big concern ? We have a government with over 100 trillion dollars in unpaid liabilities, and yet they're worried about some political commentator ? We have young men in Afghanistan fighting for the survival of our country and dying not old enough to shave, but this is what they're worried about ? We have a federal government that has thrown the Constitution into a recycling bin and we have these supposed intellectuals worrying about someone who looks like a cartoon character.

Despite what bigbrained lackwits like Krugman and Huffington think, Glenn Beck has never tried to incite violence or smear anyone. He is simply an everyday person asking easy to answer questions that the powerful elite in Washington choose not answer. He goes after Republicans just as much as he does Democrats. The funny thing is, all of Beck's research is easily reproduced by the Right Wing attack machine known as "Google". There are no hidden tricks, no secrets. According to Beck, the White House can call his little red phone and clear up any misconceptions and yet, they choose not to. Assuming this isn't just a prop, it would mean that Beck has yet to say anything that isn't true, right ?

It's funny, but I don't recall the hack Krugman or talentless Huffington bemoaning the swastikas that were painted on pictures of George Bush. Where was their outrage when another one of their brood, the human rat Keith Olbermann called on Bush to resign ? Oh, Krugman and Huffington were there. They were fanning the flames. If Glenn Beck were to do that, no one would be able to log onto the Internet for days on end as the unemployed left wing bloggers would churn out one unreadable blog after another demanding that Beck should be sent to Gitmo and be waterboarded.

There's nothing worse than bullies who can dish it out but not take it.

My New Heroes

I'd like to take a momment to introduce my two latest personal heroes--India's environmental minister Jairam Ramesh and geologist Vijay Kumar Raina, the latest in a long line of heroes standing in the way of the Progressivevik madness/ idolatrous state religion known as Global Warming, or its latest moniker, Climate Change.

In November 9th 2009 edition of the UK Guardian, Minister Ramesh said this much to the dismay of the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change about the supposedly disappearing Himalayan glaciers due to Global Warming.

"There is no conclusive scientific evidence to link global warming with what is happening in the Himalayan glaciers." Ramesh noted in a "controversial" report he filed in Dehli. The honorable minister also stated he was ready to take on "the doomsday scenarios of Al Gore."

You'd better look out, Minister Ramesh. Here in the States this is considered heresy and you're likely to be branded a "Climate Change denier" which is worse than being considered a Holocaust denier, it would seem. Minister Ramesh based his report on the work of my other new hero, geologist Vijay Kumar Raina, who concluded that "Himalayan glaciers are retreating. But it's nothing out of the ordinary. Nothing to suggest as some have said they will disappear." You better look out too, Vijay. Al Snore and his Progressivevik Gestapo allies will bury your career, too, despite the fact that Raina's report is based on 150 years worth of data. Raina's report even reports that the River Ganges isn't receding, which it would be if there was actual, not imaginary, Global Warming.

This, amongst other piles of evidence, debunk the hoax that is Global Warming caused glacier retreating. In fact the IPCC, was forced to take back its claim that the Himlayan ice caps were in any danger at all. The whole theory was based on a non-peer reviewed article by a huckster named Syed Hasnain. Since it was wanted the IPCC socialists wanted to hear, it was accepted as religious canon. (Since the truth came out, Hasnain has changed his story and now claims it's "speculation".)

Now, if you add this little scam to the East Anglia scam, where Michael Mann and his accomplices were outed for cooking the numbers on Global Warming data, what do you get ?

A President who still wants to inflict Cap and Trade on the hostages...I mean, citizens of the United States.

Let's take a little stroll down memory lane to the State of Confusion Address. Take it away, Presidente!

"I know there are those who disagree with the overwhelming scientific evidence."

Overwhelming evidence ? There's more overwhelming evidence that Santa Claus exists than there is for man made global warming, and yet, Chairman Obama wants to deliver this death blow to the American economy. Why ? It's a great way to redistribute wealth. Our Dear Leader was in all his glory at the failed Copenhagen Conference. (Which Princess Nancy, Ruler of The People's Republic of Pelosi, had to beat feet out of because of the impending snow storm heading to DC.) He couldn't wait to put money into the hands of bloodstained butchers like Robert Mugabe, the dictator of Zimbabwe so they could "combat Global Warming". Thank God the whole thing fell apart before Obama was able to do any real damage to our economy. Well, more damage than he's already done at any rate.

Don't think for one second this whole thing is dead. There are "Republicans" like John McPain, who actually believe in this nonsense. In a 2008 op-ed Mcpain wrote:

“We need a successor to Kyoto, a cap-and-trade system that delivers the necessary environmental impact in an economically responsible manner.”

Mcpain also noted that Americans needed to be "persuaded" to do this. This op-ed fron the Financial Times is just one of many reasons why we can no longer throw our trust in just one political party anymore. (Even the newest Beatle, Scott Brown voted for a regional version of this stupidity.)

The whole point is this, as Glenn Beck says, "Question with Boldness". Jairam Rumesh did. Vijay Kumar Raina did. Guess what ? They uncovered the truth. Sure, the Progressiveviks like Al Snore, Chairman Obama, and John McPain will stand in our way. They'll hit us with lie after lie and innuendo after innuendo, but we, as free citizens, can no longer just accept this nonsense cooked up to make us slaves to their whims and warped world view.

That, dear reader, is a debate that's truly over.

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Progressivenik Economic Bull Sh--

With all due apologies to my friends on the Religious Right, I have one final thing to say about Chairman Obama's State of Confusion Address, especially the parts where he fumbles his way through economic issues.

What a bunch of bull sh--.

Oh, I'm sorry. Was that too strongly worded ? Did I offend anyone ? Well, too bad. The truth has a funny way of stinging and leaving a mark.

Let's start with lie number one. Take it away, Presidente!

"One in ten Americans still cannot find work."

The actual number of America's unemployment is around 18% when you factor in the underemployed working part time or at jobs that are below their skill level. The 18% that Obama and his cronies ignore also includes the folks that said "screw it" and stopped looking for work all together. I know this little tidbit really bums out the base, but in the interest of honesty, our Dear Leader should have used this statistic. Either that, or the fact that the 99 weeks of unemployment compensation Uncle Sugar is handing out is also discouraging job seeking by making it way too easy to turn unemployment into funemployment. To be fair, I'm not going to even touch "And one year later, the worst of the storm has passed." That's just too damn easy, and I do operate with a code of honor.

Stay with me, people. Let's get those long boots on and wade through the B.S. to lie number two. Presidente ?

"They don't understand why it seems like bad behavior on Wall Street is rewarded, but hard work isn't;"

Don't get your hammer and sickle in a bunch, Dear Leader, we do get it. In fact, we're smarter than amoebas, regardless of what Bill Maher thinks. The real reason is clear: Wall Street gives piles of money to campaign coffers, including yours. Do I need to embarrass you and mention the fact that you have received over hundred thousand smackers from AIG ? Oops. I already did.

"So I know the anxieties that are out there right now."

Sure you do, O Master of Manure. You must have figured that out during your 24 thousand dollar date night with the Missus, or the 35 thousand dollar a week vacation at Martha's Vineyard. Oh, you didn't figure it out in either place ? Maybe you figured that out with all your many years laboring in the private sector ? Oh, yes,yes, I forgot. You've never had an actual job prior to your present gig. How out of touch of a statement is this ? This is almost as dumb as George Bush's "Mission Accomplished".

The next smelly pile, please.

"For these Americans, and so many others, change has not come fast enough."

Actually, it has and the American people have outright rejected it. I don't know if you're aware, Comrade President, but you and your cronies are on a losing streak. Last time I checked, your magic didn't help Creigh Deeds in Virginia, John Corzine in New Jersey, and it was certainly no help to Martha/Marcia in Massachusetts, either. The only reason New York 23 was lost was because Michael Steele dropped the ball and allowed that Dede Scuzzo-fava weirdo run as the Republican candidate. Yeah, "change" has arrived and us commoners have come to the conclusion that it sucks, pardon my language.

"One woman wrote to me and said 'We are strained but hopeful, struggling but encouraged.' "

Let me guess, the letter was signed: "Always and forever, Your Number One Fan, Ellie Light." According to Rasmussen, only 29% of those polled believe America is on the right track. I'd be hard pressed to call that a ringing endorsement.

Sigh. Next....

"To recover the rest, I've proposed a fee on the biggest banks."

It's not a fee, Baron Von Government, it's a tax. Now, I'll give credit where credit is due, our Beloved Chairman was right when he stated that the bank bailouts were as popular as a "root canal" (That lame joke would have been funnier if he said as "popular as an IRS audit" or "as popular as MSNBC". Now, that's how you make a joke.) However, in these tough times, how wise is it to screw with the banks ? Remember, these are the people who hand out loans to start up businesses, buy cars, houses, and fund plastic surgery. (Right, Madame Speaker ?) What your little populist punishment is going to do is slow the economy further. Instead of having cash on hand to fund the latest Wonderwidget project that will revolutionize some industry, the banks will be handing out cash to the bloated federal government. By the way, the banks aren't going to pay one wooden nickel of this "fee", the banks' customers will. There will be overdraft fees that will become outrageous, fees to speak to a teller, and God know what else. Way to stand up to those evil bankers, Chavez from Another Mother. Basically, Obama Hood is standing up for the folks by taxing them indirectly.

I don't know how much more of this I can take. The smell is really getting to get to me. Must remain conscious.....

"Now, let me repeat: We cut taxes."

Yeah, that 13 dollars a week is coming really handy.

Here we go. This is where I get chest pains. Brace yourselves, folks.

"Because of the steps we took, there are about 2 million Americans working right now who would otherwise be unemployed. Two hundred thousand work in construction and clean energy, 300 thousand are teachers and other education workers. [Like what, cafeteria ladies and creepy custodians ?] Tens of thousands are cops, firefighters, [and] first responders. And we're on track to add another one and half million jobs to this total by the end of this year. The plan that has made this possible is the Recovery Act. [AKA-The hated, failed stimulus package.]"

Peeyuuu! What is that smell ? The ultimate cowpie, that's what.

First of all, I want names and phone numbers of the "clean energy" workers. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AND OBAMA KNOWS IT! You'd have to theorize that one of their job requirements is feeding the unicorns or shining leperchaun gold. Seriously, I don't think people desperate for cash collecting cans for recycling is a job, do you ?

And another thing, and this is key here, what do cops, fire fighters, first responders, teachers and "other education workers" have in common ? They're all unionized government workers! They don't produce a profit! Now obviously, I don't have a beef with cops, fire fighters, or first responders. (Funny how I left off teachers and "other education workers". No, it's not a mistake, but it's another rant for another time.) But honestly, we need people who produce a profit. Who the hell is going to pay for all of this ? The very last thing we need is more government anything, especially government workers with bloated pensions. Now, if Fidelito had claimed he created 2 million private sector jobs, I'd be eating my words and changing my column's name to Absolutely NoGrahamnesty. (Hey! No funny ideas! I got dibs on that domain name.) However, Pol Pot Obama didn't do that, did he ?

I'm not going to bother to address the whole Cap and Trade thing since it's a belly up, rotting corpse in the Field of Dead Bills. But what are we to make of this:

" To make college more affordable, this bill will finally end the unwarranted taxpayer subsidies that go to banks for student loans. Instead, let's take that money and give families a $10,000 tax credit for four years of college and increase Pell Grants. And let's tell another 1 million students that when they graduate, they will be required to pay only 10 percent of their income on student loans, and all of their debt will be forgiven after 20 years -- and forgiven after 10 years if they choose a career in public service, because in the United States of America, no one should go broke because they chose to go to college."

Umm...Out of curiosity, does that mean I'm getting a check from Uncle Sugar ? After all, my school loans are paid for. And I paid for them all by lonesome like a big boy. Why can't the new "Entitled Generation" do the same ? The ugly part of this is: Not only is Barack Lenin growing government, he's actively recruiting for it! This isn't to recruit military officers (The military already has many programs like this, just ask the traitor Nidal Hassan who paid for his education.) this scam is to recruit even more useless bureaucrats who will do nothing to add society. Why should the American taxpayer be forced to pay for the education of their oppressors ? It reminds me of how the Nazis charged the wimpy French for the occupation of their country. (Yes, I'm being melodramatic. So sue me. Just kidding, ACLU.) Granted, the latest rounds of government "czars" need an education, but c'mon! We need people in the private sector! Yes, I said that before and I'll keep saying it until Ezekiel Emmanuel pulls the plug on me. We need people who produce profits, not people who produce regulations.

375 down and an eternity of shoveling crap to go.

Friday, January 29, 2010

The Progressivevik Fascism

Chairman Obama is turning into a full fledged fascist.

I'm not taking it back. I'm not going to apologize. I don't care what the dorks at Media Matters or think or ramble.

Barack Obama is attempting to turn himself into the first American dictator.

Let's look at some of the things Chairman Obama has said and done in his speech at the State of The Union address. (I'm getting the two mixed up since they're so similiar these days.)

The first incident occurred with this line: "Now, yesterday the Senate blocked a bill that would have created this commission. So I'll issue an executive order that will allow us to move foward..."[Baron Von Government was referring to the bipartisan fiscal commission] Really ? Is this how he's going to handle things ? I don't care how good or how important any program is, this just reeks of fascism. He doesn't like something Imperial Senate does, so he'll just go around them in the most unconstitutional manner. Is this the "Change" we want ? Do we want just one person making decisions for 300 million people ? Well, not for me. I look terrible in brown.

Sure Glenn Beck was all over this, but where were the rest of the media ? We just had a sitting President openly defy the Constitution and no one cared. I'm all for any attempt to rein in the monstrous spending by a bloated Uncle Sugar, but I'm not willing to set the Constitution on fire to acheive it. What if Chairman Obama rolls out of bed one morning and decides "You know what ? I'm really sick of all the criticism I receive. I'm going to issue an executive order to shut that lunatic Absolutely Nobama up and bring back the Fairness Doctrine" ?

Obama told Congress to stick it where the sun doesn't shine and the Progressiveviks all cheered. They cheered like the way the Reichstag cheered when a funny little guy with an even funnier mustache declared that ethnic Germans were being persecuted in the Sudetenland and the Reich must do something about it. Like the Reichstag all those years ago, Congress knew it was wrong but they just didn't care. Where was Joe Wilson then ? Why hasn't John Boehner or Mitch McConnell come out and scream bloody murder about this ?

The worst momment came when the Dear Leader said this: "With all due deference to seperation of powers, last week the Supreme Court reversed a century of law that I believe will open the floodgates for special interests--including foreign corporations--to spend without limit in our elections." Nevermind the fact this isn't true and the Court did no such thing, (It's still illegal for foreign buisnesses to make campaign donations.) we just witnessed a sitting President call out the Supreme Court for upholding the right to Free Speech. What madness is this ?No, the Supreme Court isn't perfect, and yes, they have made mistakes from time to time, but the Supreme Court is the backbone of our Republic. Their sole purpose is to make sure America is still America and that job is damn near impossible as is. Do we really need the President calling them out with a bunch of Progressiveviks hooting and hollering like they're on their way to a book burning ? Even Sonia Sotomayor looked disgusted by this. There's been a smattering of complaints about this little temper tantrum by the Progressiveviks, mostly on FOX, but why wasn't this on every newspaper headline ? Obama created the illusion that even the Court answers to him. It doesn't get any more dangerous than this for our beloved Republic.

All the Tea Parties and Scott Browngasims in the world aren't going to mean a thing if we let this kind of Progressivevik behavior go unchallenged. Those of us in the loyal opposition have to keep the momentum on our side because our very existence as the greatest nation on God's green (and not to mention cooling) earth depends on it.

I can see you're unconvinced. Check out this little ad the Progressiveviks from put out in USA Today that read: "Message from Massachusetts: Democrats: Fight. Don't Fold."

Who do they want to fight ? The American people ?

Thursday, January 28, 2010

The Nazis Are Coming! The Nazis Are Coming!

The HuffingtonPuffington Post is up to their old tricks. Today, they ran a piece called "Neo-Nazis, Millitants Eye Tea Party for Recruitment" by Alex Brant-Zawadzki. In this latest hit piece against everyday Americans who stand up to liberal elitism, this "journalist" from San Francisco claims Neo-Nazis see the Tea Party Movement as a fertile breeding ground for their stupidity.

I gotta hand it to the HuffingtonPuffington Post. They know how to make me laugh in these troubled times.

I don't know if anyone in the liberal elite establishment knows or even cares, there are many black Partygoers. In the Parties I've attended, Col. Allen West, a black Conservative, was mobbed by Partygoers like he was the Second Coming. Here in Florida, many of the Partygoers are of Cuban descent. In fact, when Florida Tea Party members aren't gushing over Col. West, they're hanging on Senate candidate Marco Rubio's every word as if he came down from Mt. Limbaugh carrying two Conservative stone tablets.

I'd be hard pressed to call that a fertile breeding ground for the Aryan Nation, wouldn't you ?

Now of course, the racist liberals don't see it that way. They can't afford to. Battling imaginary racism is a big business for them. They profit by creating division and sowing the seeds of discontent that keep them in office. If it weren't for liberals and their quest to control minds and hearts, there would be no racism in America. These disciples of Saul Alinsky have realized that a House Divided is much easier to control than a House United. Don't believe me ? Check out Chairman Obama's reference to his own grandmother as a "typical white person", Harry (I Surrender) Reid's view of the black dialect, and the ever so quotable Chrissy Matthews who forgot for an hour that Chairman Obama was black. Do you see this poison coming out of the mouths of Conservatives ? Negative.

Want a color blind society ? Get rid of those racist liberals.

Don't Ask Don't Tell: Why Now ?

It looks like Chairman Obama is bored.

Apparently, the implementation of socialism, keeping leftist cronies happy, destroying health care, and sinking the economy with Cap and Trade and Card Check is not challenging enough.

To score the proverbial hat trick, he's out to destroy the military as well.

Let's get this out of the way from now: I actually support gays in the military. They've been there since Valley Forge and they'll be there until the final battles of Armageddon. Believe me, a hot round from an M-16 tearing into the flesh of some terrorist could care less if the shooter is gay, and the hot round from an AK-47 could care less if it's tearing into the flesh of a gay solidier or Marine, either.

The bottom line is, no one who's ever seen combat could care less if their buddy in a fox hole is gay. They care if the guy is a coward or a lousy shot.

However, there's no way to defend Obama's renewed call for the end of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell". This isn't about gay rights, this is about a sinking President pandering to a defeated, tired base. This is a President so hungry for any sort of victory he'll do anything, including giving another crippling blow to national security. The military has two active wars in Iraq and Afghanistan to worry about. It also has to worry about Yemen, Iran, and North Korea. There's also the unconstitutional deployment to Haiti and the civil unrest that's surely on it's way to worry about as well. The US military is the greatest army ever assembled in world history, but even they aren't supermen or superwomen. You can only stretch them so far, and the last thing they need is a pointless debate stirred up by some community organizer who's never served a day in his life.

Now, of course, the "This year I will work with Congress and our military to finally repeal the law that denies gay Americans the right to serve the country they love because of who they are." may draw applause from the liberal backbenchers and sounds enlightened, but the truth is many gays already serve in the military, and this is just another shot at the Right. Most on the Right couldn't give a rat's hind quarters what two consenting adults do in the privacy of their own home, just like most military commanders could care less what their charges do on their 48 hour passes. What the repeal of " Don't Ask, Don't Tell" will do is bog the military down in Request Masts and other pointless litigation at a time when distraction is needed least.

To quote a buddy of mine who is a former SEAL (and no, he wasn't court martialed for punching a terrorist in the tummy):

"The job of the military is to kill people and blow sh-- up."

The military exists for that purpose and that purpose alone. It's not some social experiment.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Republican Wimps!

Just when I thought I was back in, they push me back out.

A couple of months ago, when Joe Wilson was forced to apologize for calling out Chairman Obama on his falsehoods by the Republican leadership, I had enough and left the Republican party and joined the Libertarian party. Forcing Wilson to apologize was the straw that broke the camel's back for me. I was tired of the lies and the liars who told them. I grew weary of defending Republican policies that were nothing more than liberal policies with an -R stamp of approval. (Like No Child Left Behind and Medicare Part D, to name a few.)

Then, Scott Brown won in Massachusetts. Maybe the GOP wasn't the collection of wimps that I thought they were. (Not only that, who the hell wants to vote for people they've never heard of or vote for people their own mother isn't voting for ?) I really thought the GOP finally got the message and decided to act like Conservatives, not like socialist lites. I was finally ready to get that elephant tattoo I've always wanted. (I'm afraid of needles the way liberals are afraid of getting jobs.)

Then, like clockwork, the Republicans let me down once again. Just when they have victory tossed in their lap by The Supreme Court, John McPain and Olympia Snowejob channeled their inner liberal by complaining that the Court found McPain-Feingold campaign finance reform bill was unconstitutional. I was crushed. They stabbed me in the back again.

The McPain-Feingold bill "regulates" who gives what political donation to whom and who could fund political ads and when they could be ran in federal campaigns. In other words, some non-elected bureaucrat in the Federal Election Commitee was going to chill Freedom of Speech to make campaigns "fair." McPain-Feingold was supposed to limit corporate and union donations but ended up attacking non profits like Swift Boat Veterans for Truth and (Yeah, I'm defending them in this case.) Their crime ? Not registering as political committees with the FEC. Since when do you have to register with the government to exercise your right to Free Speech ?

This venture into fascism was brought to a head by Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission. Apparently some documentary on Hillary Clinton did not meet the bureaucracy's standard of what was and was not a political ad. This would be fine if we lived in Nazi Germany, but much to the dismay of Ed Schultz, we don't. The Court did its job and struck down this nonsense and killed most of McPain Feingold.

On paper, it looked like John McPain and Pus Feingold had the right idea. They were trying to "protect" the American people from the special interests. However, there are plenty of holes in their argument. The first hole ? Special interests are only dangerous after elections because politicians are more than willing to throw them under the bus no matter how much cash they put in a politician's war chest. For example, let's take Chairman Obama and his buddies at SEIU. SEIU handed the Dear Leader over 60 million reasons to keep them in his thoughts and prayers during the campaign. Then, when the reality of having to pay for Obamacareless hit Congress in the jaw, the Merry Band of Socialists cooked a scheme to have unions pay a special tax on their "Cadillac" health care plans. Naturally, Andy Stern, The SEIU Reichsfuhrer was outraged. He marched into Obama's office and called in a favor, and thus unions were exempted from the "Cadillac" tax, against Obama's will. The Dear Leader knew Obamacareless would die without the tax (at the time, he fully expected Martha/Marcia Coakley to kick Brown's tail.), and he was more than willing to throw SEIU the bus to get his signature socialist program passed. The second hole ? Special interests like and The Swift Boat Veterans aren't looking to influence the election as much as they are looking to get their message out to the public while the public is paying attention to something other than American Idol. The Swifties didn't care if you voted for George W. Bush, they only cared that John Kerry was exposed for the fraud that he is. just wanted to get their message out that America sucks. The third hole ? Political ads don't change anyone's mind of who they're voting for, they only appeal to the base of a candidate. No one was going to abandon Sarah Palin and her very old and confused running mate because of some "Hopey Changey" ad by the Obama machine, just like the jobless, twenty something yearolds living on their parents' couch weren't going to moved by some commercial that detailed McPain's Vietnam experience.

I'm sorry, but there's no way I'm ever going to rejoin the Republican party. I reject the Socialist Democrat party because they reject the Constitution and Freedom of Speech. I'll keep rejecting the Republican party as long as Olympia Snowejob and John McPain are still in the party. They are after all, doing the same thing.

Time To Kill The Seventeenth Amendment

Despite the hype of Scott Brown's miracle, one fact flew under the Conservative radar: It's time to repeal the Seventeenth Amendment of The Constitution. (Yes, I promised not to write anymore Scott Brown columns, but if Chairman Obama can break promises anytime he damn well feels like, I'm sure you'll permit me a little lattitude, right ?)

For those of you who were punished with a public school "education", the Seventeenth Amendment allows for the direct election of Senators for the Imperial Senate. The Founding Fathers (you know, the crazy, old, white, Right Wing Extremists that founded this country much to the dismay of Ed Schultz.) wanted to keep as much political power in the states' hands as possible, so they originally had state legislations appoint Senators. Each state had its own method of choosing its own Senators, so occaisonally there was gridlock and accusations of corruption. (Sort of like the poltical climate we have today, except back then, there wasn't an MSNBC to take sides.) Finally, in 1906, the direct election controversy came to a head when David Graham Phillips wrote an article called the Treason of the Senate for the magazine Cosmopolitan. (No, we're not talking about the same Cosmo that Rachel Madcow should be reading. Granted, most Right Wing Extremists are ungodly grotesque, but they should not allow Madcow on the air looking like that. Her dozen or so viewers should not have to look at that every night. A little payback for those teabagger comments.)

The article was scathing, accusing Senators of being in the pockets of financiers and industrialists. (Think of David Graham Phillips as the first annoying leftwing blogger.) It proved to be popular and was turned into a series of articles, and the idea was born for a Constitutional Amendment for the direct election of Imperial Senators. The amendment was ratified on April 8, 1913. Thus, Big Government was born after killing its parent, Federalism.

Unfortunately, this system has not worked out well at all. The state governments have been neutered by the Federal Government and are completely useless, like Keith Olbermann. The unintended result of The Seventeenth Amendment is the fact that the states are now subservient to their Federal masters since they have no representation in the Federal Government. This has meant all kinds of bullying by Uncle Sugar over the years, like the now defunct Obamacareless. Had the Senators actually have to answer to their legislatures, Obamacareless would never have left committee, since it was one giant unfunded mandate. Under the old system, there was cooperation between the Federal government and state governments. Now the only cooperation that exists between the Federal and state governments is "Do it our way or starve". Uncle Sugar has thought nothing of beating down the states by witholding funds. The Antisemitic Peaunt Farmer did it back in the '70's to enforce his 55 mile per hour speed limit. George W. did it with his No Child Left Behind nonsense. God only knows what Chairman Obama still has up his sleeve. The point is, the direct election of US Senators has put too much power in the greedy paws of the Federal Government, and the only way to fix the Big Government problem we have is repealing the The Seventeenth Amendment.

Hey, don't take my word for it. I'm just another talking head. Let's ask an actual expert:

"Direct elections of Senators...allowed Washington's special interests to call the shots, whether it is filling judicial vacancies, passing laws, or issuing regulations."--Senator Zell Miller (D-GA)

Well put, Senator. Well put.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Starving For Leadership

I swear to God, this will be my final Scott Brown column.

However, there are issues that need to be addresed since everyone on the Right has lost their mind.

Enough with the Brown for President nonsense.

Recently, "Number 41" was asked by media hack if he was running for President in 2012. Of course, the newest Beatle coyly shrugged off the question since most in the media aren't mentally competent and when they ask moronic questions and it isn't polite to mock those with mental handicaps. Nonetheless, there are many on the Right acting like thirteen year old girls and have started daydreaming about Scott Brown parking his pickup truck at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

Well, knock it off.

Scott Brown did the unthinkable and took down the Democratic machine in Massachusetts, which is the most Herculean task the Republican party has achieved in many years. Kudos for the conquering hero, but do I really need to mention the last time America fell in love with a state senator with a charming smile ? Does the Republican party really need its own Chairman Obama ? Why don't we let Harry "I Surrender" Reid give him a key to the Imperial Senate's bathroom before we make Brown the Anointed One Part II ?

I understand why this has happened. The United States is starving for actual leadership. We defintely had it under Reagan and briefly under George W. Bush, but let's face it, do we have that now ? Did we have that under the Walking Hormone Clinton ? Did we have that under the less than inspiring George Bush Sr. ? If you answered yes to any of the following questions, please seek professional help.

The United States is crying out for an actual leader who listens and makes actual decisions. America wants and deserves a President who inspires, not with pretty speeches, but with tangible results that command respect. America wants decisions made quickly and efficiently. These are skills that Scott Brown may have, but he has to prove himself first. There is a big difference between deciding what to put on a state license plate and deciding on sending troops to Afghanistan. If anything, the debacle that has been the Reign of Chairman Obama has taught us the value of experience, and let's face it, currently Scott Brown doesn't bear the scars of actual governance yet. When he stares down a media assault for killing one of Obama's socialist programs, we'll know he has what it takes. (Don't be fooled, the leftist media hated Obamacareless as much as the Right did, too.) When Scott Brown kills a John McPain or Lindsey Grahamnesty amendment or bill, then maybe he'll have what it takes. But we don't know yet, do we ?

Let's hang on to that anointing oil for wee bit longer, shall we ?

Media Matters Doesn't Matter

I must admit, I'm going to miss the health care debate. The screaming, the shouting, the accusations of genocide...what ever will I do now that Chairman Obama's socialist agenda has died a well deserved death ? How will I keep my elbows nice and sharp ?

Luckily for me, there's an easy target for me to attack while our Dear Leader regains his bearings. It's the dork-fest known as Media Matters, a George Soros funded media watch dog outfit that only watches FOX news. I, like Greg Gutfeld of Red Eye fame, have had enough of these clowns. (Mainly, I'm annoyed that they haven't attacked me yet. You can't be a Right Wing Extremist superstar until Media Matters gives you a special section on their very slow, lame website.)

Try as I might, I can't find the page on MSNBC's bias. Hmmmm......

Are there Right leaning shows on FOX ? You betcha! There's Hannity, Huckabee, Fuhrer Beck, and Red Eye. There's also left leaning shows like Geraldo At Large and the unwatchable Sheperd Smith. I'd be hard pressed to consider Bill O'Reilly a frothing, gun toting fringer, and Greta Van Sustern is actually a liberal. The point is, FOX is truly the most balanced news organization on God's green (and not to mention cooling) earth. For every Conservative on FOX, there's a liberal whack job opposing him. Regular lib contributors include Alan Colmes, Bob Beckel, LaMont Hill, Pat Gaddell, Geraldine Ferraro, and a whole host of others to grate on my frayed nerves.

On MSNBC we have....Joe Scarborough and the washed up Pat Buchanan. That's it. No opposing views, just talking points from the DNC and Chairman Obama. So...Where's Media Matters ? Why isn't David Brock pounding his desk demanding answers on this insult to journalism ? Why isn't Brock crying that Jeffrey Immelt and his gang at GE are capitalist death pigs twisting the religion of Global Warming to make a quick buck while using MSNBC as their PR firm ? For that matter, why isn't David Brock demanding to know why there's an Obama boutique in the lobby of NBC headquarters ?

Well, there's two answers to this query.

The first answer is pretty obvious: MSNBC is unwatchable, even for communists. Judging by their ratings, most people would rather give Joy Behar a foot rub with their tongues than watch this drivel. There isn't enough cocaine and No-Doz on earth to keep anyone with an IQ over 40 interested in any of their lackluster shows. I know this first hand, since I watched MSNBC on the night Scott Brown dethroned Chairman Obama as America's favorite politician. I wanted to take some cruel satisfaction out of watching Keith Olbermann cry on the air, so I watched. In about 20 minutes, I was fast asleep. I was in such a boredom induced slumber, my wife thought I followed Ted Kennedy into the Great Beyond. Yes, MSNBC is about as entertaining as proctology exam in an IRS office. Maybe even George Soros can't scare his minions into watching this crud.

The other option is far scarier: The lackwits at Media Matters actually think this is competent, respectable journalism. If that's the case they're in really in trouble. Here's a few things they missed:

--Chris Matthews laughing at the thought of Israel being exterminated by Iran.

--Chris Matthews' on air crush on Obama, claiming he gets thrills up his leg when Obama speaks.

--Chris Matthews cursing at a Tea Party member who brought a gun legally to a rally.

--Rachel MadCow insulting protesting Americans by calling them "tea baggers".

--Janaene Garofolo and the untalented Keith Olbermann calling anyone with a beef with Obama's socialist program a racist.

--Ed Schultz calling the US Constitution outdated.

--Ed Schultz claiming Congress works for Obama.

--Keith Olbermann's wild claims that 45,000 Americans die every year because they have no health insurance. (For the record that statistic has never been proven. There isn't a toe tag on earth that reads "lack of insurance." Since 85% of Americans have health insurance, it would mean that many, many more people die with insurance. Using Overbite's logic, that would mean insurance is actually bad for your health. Thank God Brown killed that off, eh ?)

I could go on, but it will make my Post MSNBC Stress Disorder act up, and without a public option, what would I do ?

The point to this little rant is this: Never throw stones when you live in an eco-friendly glass house.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Great Scott!

Many leftists are singing the blues right now. Ed Schultz is looking for a place he can vote ten times. Chrissy Matthews no longer has a thrill running down his leg. There is an unconfirmed report that Keith Olbermann wet himself on the air, and Katie Couric is allegedly on suicide watch. There is palpable fear in the socialist intelligentsia.

Oh, I do love it so.

I know the spinsters on The View are looking at each other with confused looks on their botoxed mugs. Whoopi Goldberg cried out to the heavens screaming, "How can this be ? Is not Chairman Obama the Chosen One promised to us by the Alinsky Tablets and was he not baptized by St. Oprah in the Volga River in the Soviet Holy Land ? What in Mother Nature's name is going on here ?" (Yeah, yeah, this doesn't include Elisabeth Hasselbeck. Thanks for ruining my joke.)

For any liberal who is questioning tonight's crushing defeat, here's a little reminder of why Martha, Marsha or whatever the hell her name is, lost. (So tell me, Congressman Kennedy, what is her name ? Forgot already ?)

To my knowledge, Scott Brown:

--had nothing to do with the attempted sale of a Senate seat.

--never called Cambridge police officers stupid.

--never palled around with racist "ministers" or washed up, has been terrorists.

--never had anything to with disreputable fundraisers who are now sitting in prison.

--never covered up a Crucifix when he made a speech.

--never called America "arrogant" or "dismissive".

--never mentioned "the great religion of Islam" while putting down Christianity and Judaism.

--never thought it was a swell idea to read Miranda rights to captured terrorists.

--never had his wife make a speech and say "For the first time in my life, I'm proud of my country".

--never thought handing Fillipino WWII veterans 198 million dollars would be a valuable part of an economic stimulus plan.

--never fired a CEO.

--never appointed a communist as a "Green Jobs" Czar.

--never had a job summit where he invited non profits and unreadable columnists from bankrupt newspapers to participate.

--never wanted to give Consitutional rights to religious terrorists.

--can actually say the word "terrorist".

--never appointed a School Safety Czar who had a drug habit and an undying admiration for a communist pedophile.

--never really had anything nice to say about Chinese dictators who are responsible for the deaths of untold millions of people.

--never made fun of the Special Olympics on some late night talk show.

Hmm...Who did all that and couple of thousand other stupid things...Call me crazy and off my meds, but that sure sounds like our Dear Leader, Chairman Obama, doesn't it ?

Make no mistake about it, Scott Brown may have run a campaign to end all campaigns, but this was a "nay" vote to the creeping socialism unleashed by Obama Hood and his Merry Band of Socialists. Even the folks in bright blue Massachusetts are scared out of their minds by the direction our beloved Republic is heading. Remember, when it's all said and done, this is the place the American Revolution was born and the folks knew the program Chairman Obama is pushing is as Counter Revolutionary as it gets. No, Massachusetts isn't going to morph into Texas anytime soon, but it's nice to know that actual Americans still live there.

If this keeps up I'll have to tattoo Yaz on my arm.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Back To Work!

Newly elected Massachusetts Senator Scott Brown did the unthinkable, slaying the demons that have haunted Republicans ever since Ted Kennedy drove his car off the pier in Chappaquidick. He has won a Senate seat that the rest of the world considered unattainable for anyone to the right of Lenin.

Let's give Senator Brown some applause. Hooray!

Ok--settle down, now. Everyone back to work.

We as Conservatives can't rest on our laurels now. If we want our country back, we're going to have to work that much harder. That means we have to keep the heat on Chairman Obama and his schemes. Now that he's wounded and backed into a corner, he'll be more dangerous than ever. If we're not careful, we could peter out right here.

The first thing we have to do is take back the Republican party once and for all. That means being in lock step. No more John McPain mavericks or Lindsey Grahamnesty making insane comments. That means every Republican acting in unison and voting NO on everything Obama Hood and Merry Band of Socialists cook up. Does that mean being obstructionist ? Sure does. Does that mean being partisan ? Yup. Does that mean ignoring the likes of Ed Schultz and those of his questionable ilk ? You bet. We need warriors right now, not wimps. If you get all misty eyed when some dork at Media Matters or The Huffandpuffington Post writes a negative blog about you, do us all a favor and don't bother running for reelection in November.

Speaking of wimps, we need to keep our eyes on the likes of Susan Collins and Olympia Snowe, the socialist-lites from Maine. These two are clueless enough to be dangerous. Mitch McConnell needs to be the adult and lay down the law with these twits. Granted, ol' Mitch has the personality of Al Snore on downers, but he must convey the fact that any cooperation from them with the liberals will cost them their political careers, no question about it, no if's, ands, or buts about it. There's a time and place for that sort of thing, like C-Span panels after our country and freedom is no longer hanging from a thread and they have been safely replaced by actual Conservatives, not people of the David Brooks and Joe Scarborough school of thought.

Finally, and I can't believe I have to say this, but here it goes: No scandals. If you're an Imperial Senator or CONgress person, clean up any little messes you have now. That means restrict all sexual activity to your spouses. That means no trips to Argentina to secretly visit "the love of your life". That means no sweetheart deals. That means no boondoggle earmarks. In short, pretend like Denny Hastert never existed and pretend like Newt Gingrich is breathing down your neck again. Is that innocent little bribe worth your country ? Is that hooker really worth plunging the American people into the socialist pit ? (It might also be helpful not to attend the birthday parties of unrepentant segregationists as well.) In short, the lamestream media will be attempting to avenge Chairman Obama's honor for this sacrilege, so everyone needs to be on their toes.

All right, folks! We have a government to shrink! Why is everyone still standing around ?

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Error Southers

I hate to admit it, but the socialist Democratic party is kind of cute when the're stumped and frustrated. They're kind of like my cat trapped underneath a blanket on my bed. Thrashing about and utterly confused in an adorable way. (Not related, but my little Bootsies is way smarter than that dunce Barney "What Housing Crisis ?" Fwank, but that's another story for another time.) It's ABSOLUTELY priceless watching them have the nerve to wonder aloud why Jim DeMint and his Republican allies have stonewalled TSA nominee Erroll Southers.

Before we get started, let me be perfectly clear: I am not a Republican. I'm a fun loving Libertarian. I can't see myself allied with people like John Mcpain and Lindsey Grahamnesty. I think the Republicans are just as guilty as the Democrats for the mess our country is in. However, when they're right, I'll be the first to admit it, and when they're wrong, I'll out them for socialist-lites many of them are. In the case of Error Southers, I'll put my money on DeMint.

DeMint caught some flak after the whole "Skidmark Bomber" incident Christmas Day. The socialists shrieked that had Southers been confirmed and was running the TSA, The Skidmark Bomber would never have gotten on flight 253. Yes, the oldest political party in the United States believes another overpaid bureaucrat would have made a difference in that sordid affair. (Who could blame them, really ? It's the only thing they know how to do: Appoint unqualified, unvetted people to high profile posts. You can't teach old socialist dogs new tricks.)

Now, why would the Republican Party, the party of national security, hold up such an important nomination ? Well, just like the dearly departed communist "green jobs" czar Van Jones, Error Southers is a committed leftist, and running the TSA is no place for Marxists. This guy, get this, thought it would be a swell idea to unionize TSA workers. I guess they would be comitted SEIU members and go marching on AIG executives' homes, or something leftist like that. In a rare moment of clarity (also known as an election year), the Republicans shot down Southers, rightly stating that unionized TSA workers would be a threat to national security.

Oh yeah, he lied to Congress, too.

Error Southers has a nasty habit of abusing power, using his powers as an FBI agent to do background checks on his ex-wife's new boyfriend. Naturally, Southers, during his confirmation hearings lied about the whole thing, and when it looked he would be confirmed, he wrote a letter that supposedly cleared up the" inconsistencies" of his testimony. In other words, he lied. In his testimony he claimed a friend in the San Diego PD ran the checks, in his letter to Congress, he admitted that he ran the checks. I don't know about you, and maybe it's my inner Libertarian acting up, but I don't want some government hack with axes to grind looking up my personal information. Yeah, that's crazy talk, I know.

Like the rest of Chairman Obama's Rogue's Gallery, Error Southers has a skeleton in his closet. In 2008, Southers said in an interview: "Most of the domestic [terror] groups we pay attention to here are white supremacist groups. They're anti-government, in most cases, anti-abortion, they are usually survivalist type[s] in nature, identity oriented." If that wasn't dumb enough for government work, he continued with: "Those groups that claim to be extremely anti-government and Christian Identity oriented."

Hooray. We have another Janet From Another Planet Napolitano in our midst.

What this actually means is that Error Southers is more interested in watching American citizens, whom as we are all well aware, did not fly planes into the World Trade Center or the Pentagon. This guy would be keeping close tabs on Mormon Missionaries while ignoring "people" like the Skidmark Bombers. Error and Janet From Another Planet are so intent on finding the next Timothy McVeigh they have rendered themselves brain dead. Call me crazy and off my meds, but I really think we should be keeping our eyes on jihadist-inspired terror. Just a crazy hunch.

One thing DeMint should be focusing on is one simple question: Who is vetting these people ? Bozo the Clown ?

Sacred Cows

Recently, Pastor Pat Robertson and Rush Limbaugh learned, you don't mess with the left's sacred cows, especially their new sacred cow, the misery in Haiti.

Oh boy, are we in for it now.

Limbaugh took heat when he mentioned that "...we've already donated to Haiti. It's called the US income tax." Despite the statement is as obvious as the world is round, left wing bloggers all over cyberspace got off their parents' couches and started up the old reliable "Limbaugh needs to get off the air" machine that runs on eco-pixie dust. Jamison Foster, a senior fellow at the communist backed Media Matters, (Exactly how does one become a senior fellow at Media Matters ? Is there a contest like "who can go the longest without an actual job" ? Enquiring minds want to know.) even went back to 1994 to ridicule Limbaugh's comments on the military coup that brought down then Marxist dictator of Haiti, Aristide. The left also cried and cried about Limbaugh's other commentary that claimed Obama would use the tragedy to enhance his standing with the "light-skinned and dark-skinned members of the black community." The sad thing is, Limbaugh wasn't mocking blacks, he was mocking Imperial Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (S-NV) and even the lackwits at Media Matters knew it, but the fired away at Limbaugh anyway. I guess when it comes to defending their sacred cows, the left leaves common sense at the door.

Now, Rush Limbaugh is a big boy and he doesn't need me to defend him. But I will defend Pat Robertson and the beating he took all over the media, even from FOX news. In case you've been hiding in a cave with Osama Bin Laden the last couple of days, Pat Robertson has been ridiculed up and down for a little story he told about how Haiti was cursed because they made a deal with the devil to be free from France. (If Obamacareless passes, I'll wager many people will be willing to make the same deal to get rid of it, but that's another story for another time.) Now, being the understanding soul that I am, I'll explain Robertson's view to the leftists since Christianity is a foreign view to them like "work" and "shower". There's this Book that Christians believe in called a Bible. In this Book, natural disasters are explained as God's anger. No, you won't find Robertson's Haiti story in there, it's a legend with as many holes in it as the liberals' religion of Man Made Global Warming. To a fundamentalist Christian (and also the Catholic Church) belief that the devil exists to torture mankind is an article of faith, just like to liberals it's an article of faith to believe that raising taxes will somehow save the world and lower the earth's temperature or Chairman Obama never heard a racist peep out of Jeremiah Wright despite spending twenty years at his church. Robertson was simply exercising his religious beliefs to claim that Haiti was cursed by the devil. I guess Pastor Robertson should have known better. The only religion considered viable by the left are the ones that inspire lunatics to fly planes into crowded buildings in New York and only the United States deserves natural disasters.

We, as Conservatives, have a responsibility that's kind of fun. We have to turn the left's new sacred cow into steak as soon as possible or the people of Haiti will never get the help they so desperately need. If we leave it up to Chairman Obama's drones, these people will be given a bunch of useless solar panels to start a green economy with Van Jones and his pal Pookie running the show. After the rubble is cleared, we need to get actual business men down there to teach the folks how an economy without foreign aid and rogue dictators work. Finally Haiti will be free of their curse.

The curse of relying on others to forge one's own destiny.

Friday, January 15, 2010

Time To Be Even More Controversial!

It has been announced that 10 thousand troops are heading to Haiti.

Hmm....10 thousand....Where have I heard that number before ?

Oh yeah! That's the number of troops Chairman Obama stiffed General Stanley McChrystal, who requested 40 thousand but got 30 thousand troops to make sure Afghanistan doesn't turn into another Vietnam.

Call me crazy and off my meds, but didn't Chairman Obama campaign on how Afghanistan was the "right war" ? Didn't our Dear Leader warn us of the danger of al-Qaeda and the Taliban geting their filthy paws on Pakistan's nuclear weapons ? Remember that dull and uninspired speech he gave at West Point that not only put the cadets to sleep, but preempted The Charlie Brown Christmas Special and disappointed children all over the country ? (I don't have to remind you it took months of dithering to reach that conclusion, do I ? If you're reading my column, you're a politically astute person who also doesn't need to be reminded that McChrystal had to damn near beg on TV for help.)

It's beyond apparent that Chairman Obama is in way over his head and now his inexperience in running anything is crystal clear. He is making a very dangerous mistake that can not only cost American lives but millions of lives in India as well. If al-Qaeda isn't stopped in northern Pakistan, there very well could be a nuclear strike in either the United States or India. In either scenario, that means nuclear war and ACTUAL global warming, as in human beings turning into ash. By not giving McChrystal the troops he needs to finally put an end to this nonsense and instead sending them to Haiti, Obama is gambling with our lives. Given his track record so far, I'm more than a little concerned.

What's even more maddening is we have had three terrorist attacks in less than a year. (The Arkansas recruiting station, Benedict Hasan, and the Skidmark Bomber). al-Qaeda isn't retreating, they're reloading. (Yes, I stole that line from Sarah Palin and her awesome book Going Rogue.) They're more dangerous than ever, and yet Chairman Obama has decided that Haiti is one of his top priorities. Yes, it's a tragedy, but Obama was not selected by the media to be our President to fix Haiti, he was selected to protect the United States. Those horrific scenes we see in Haiti could be an American city after some jihadist ignites a "dirty" nuclear weapon. Think it can't happen ? The Skidmark Bomber walked through security at a foreign airport despite his own father ratting him out to the US State of Confusion Department and being on all kinds of terror watch lists. Two attention seekers waltzed through White House security and crashed a state dinner. Not exactly a record of success, is it ?

Another thing, why are we sending thousands of troops into Haiti when that manpower is needed on the Mexican border ? I know, I'm a Hispanophobe, right, Media Matters ? Last time I checked, the drug cartel violence is spreading to border towns in Arizona and our supposedly brilliant Presidente has remained silent on the matter. Not only that, what's to stop some Jihado-Nazi from slinking into Phoenix and making its inhabitants glow in the dark with a nuclear weapon or walking into an elementary school with those ever so fashionable dynamite vests ? The cold hard truth: ABSOLUTELY nothing but a chain link fence with a lot of holes in it and a few dedicated Border Patrol agents. That's all that stands in their way.

Now, I don't want the dorks at Media Matters to think I'm some sort of Jihadophobe, so like Fox News, I'm going to be fair and balanced. Kim Jong Mentally Ill, the Muppet-like dictator of North Korea, celebrated Chairman Obama's coronation by test firing missiles and giving the US the proverbial middle finger. If Chairman Obama was going to be squeamish about sending the requested amount of troops to Afghanistan, fine. What about Korea, Presidente ? I'd have to say a rogue dictator threatening to fire missiles Hawaii's direction is a clear and present danger to our national security. I didn't even need Obama's fancy schmancy degrees from Harvard and Occidental College to figure that one out.

Finally, and I really need to say this since even FOX is afraid to touch this subject with a ten foot pole, what's the exit strategy ? Is Haiti just going to be yet another pit the federal government throws tax dollars into ? If you haven't noticed, our politicians are are masters at sending our troops into harm's way, but, pardon my language here, they really suck at exit strategies. Haiti made Afghanistan look like Oprah's beloved socialist Denmark before the earthquake, now there's anarchy. The only things Haiti exported before the earthquake were pleas for help. Now what ? How will Haiti ever recover economically ? If Chairman Obama can't run the most powerful economy in world history, he sure as hell can't build one from scratch in a country with no natural resources and corruption that almost rivals Chicago's . Guess who's going to foot the bill ? We are! All of us arrogant and dismissive Americans who are losing jobs left and right, that's who. Sure, there's telethons and"compassionate" celebrities pretending to care now, but what about a year from now when both taxes and unemployment shoot through the roof because of Obamacare ? Do you really think the compassion will continue then ? Haiti will turn into a political hot potato as whichever political party not in power will blame the party in power for the continued failure in Haiti, only furthering the suffering of these poor people. Neither Republicans or Democrats will be able to resist the temptation.

I've said it before, but it's worth repeating: Obama and his sycophants should get the hell out of the way and let private charities and (sigh!) the UN handle this. He would have done well to cut a public service announcement commercial, flash a smile, annouce a special tax deduction for donations for the Hatian recovery, and watch actual progress unfold.

Who knows, he might learn a few things about the private sector.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Time To Be Controversial!

I'm going to save the dorks at Media Matters,, and every other leftist group some time. After all, they're very busy undermining America, so their time is valuable. Here we go: The author of Absolutely Nobama is a racist, a homophobe, and a greedy capitalist. He probably doesn't recycle. He should be charged with a hate crime, dammit!

Now, why would my pals on the left think that way ? The answer is easy. The United States government should not be helping Haiti.

Oh my--Where's Eric Holder ? Cuff him! Cuff him! Send him to a political re-education camp! That'll show him!

Now, I didn't say America shouldn't help Haiti, I said the monolithic, bloated federal government should not be helping Haiti. In fact, I lost my lunch when Chairman Obama said Haiti had the "full support" of the federal government.

Gee, wouldn't it be swell if Chairman Obama felt that way about the troops ? Small business owners ? Us working slobs working who work for the small business owners ? To quote Glenn Beck: "Really ?"

I don't know if you've heard, but our beloved Republic is broke. We simply can't afford to have Uncle Sugar dump all kinds of cash into Haiti. I know that's a horrible way to look at this, but it's unfortunately true. The United States is trillions upon trillions of dollars in debt. According to, the United States government has over 100 trillion dollars in unpaid liabilities. There isn't enough wealth on the planet to even remotely pay this debt. I know, I know, lives are more important than money, but charity must start at home. You can't go making donations when the bank is coming to foreclose on you.

Another thing Chairman Obama has failed to consider is the fact that we can't divert resources from the military for this effort. I know this isn't Obambi's favorite subject, but we are involved in two wars. Those wars are stretching the military thin, dangerously thin. I know Obama is trying to be buddy-buddy with everyone, but we still have to keep our eyes on Kim Jong Mentally Ill and Adolf Ahmadinejad. Citgo Chavez is dumb enough to be dangerous and Raul may not be Fidel, but I wouldn't trust him as far as I could throw him. Oh yeah, let's not forget warm and cuddly al-Qaeda. Call me crazy and off my meds, but wouldn't you say the military has more than enough to do ? It's not like they're cutting out early on Fridays, you know. What national security aims will be met by the inevitable troop deployment that's around the corner ? And yes, the troops will be thrown into harm's way when the rioting and the complimentary civil war begins.

Now call me cynical, but wasn't the United Nations supposed to fix the infrastructure of Haiti ? How many billions of dollars has the United Nations wasted of American taxpayer money trying to have Haiti join the eighteenth century ? How many more billions will they waste now ? It's a galling thought considering the fact the American people are in for a very rude awakening when the tax man comes next year after Obamacareless is shoved down their throats. The fact that my money is being thrown away by the federal government is bad enough. The fact that my money will be thrown away by Haiti's government is beyond contempt. At very least, the American taxpayer has the right to insist that corrupt American politicians waste their money, not corrupt foreign politicians. By the way, where in the Constitution does it say that Congress has the right to be the world's insurance man ? Is it me or is it every time there's a natural disaster the American taxpayer is footing the bill ? I'm all about being charitable, but not with Uncle Sugar holding a gun to my head forcing me to be charitable.

There is a way to help the people in Haiti, as human conscience compels us to do. Charities. I can gurantee that the Red Cross or Red Crescent would do a hell of a lot better job than the federal government would. (A crazy thought, I know, since FEMA did such a bang up job in New Orleans after Katrina.) I'm fairly certain Catholic Charities would do a way better job than UNICEF or any of the other acronyms the UN will send into Haiti. The UN peacekeepers can stay, but they have to promise not to rape the locals. Raul and ol' Citgo can help if they want, but they must be reminded that if they get too adventurous, it will be considered an act of war against the United States and also a crime against humanity.

Ok, Hatemonger! Where are the charities getting the money for this ?

That's easy, America.

But you just wrote an entire paragraph of hatespeech screaming how the federal government is broke! Make up your mind, you Conservative fascist!

Contrary to what Chairman Obama thinks, the United States is the most charitable country in humanity's sad and demented history. The American people will give willingly to help the people of Haiti. It's in our DNA and that's how we roll. What Obama Hood and his Merry Band of Socialists could do if they really wanted to help Haiti and not pretend to help is create a really large tax deduction for donations to actually help Haiti. Yes, they would have to spend less to make up the short fall (Stop it! It not THAT funny!) or kill a few worthless programs. (I'm serious! Stop laughing!) Since the government would feel the need to do something, they could monitor the donation money and keep it free from fraud and abuse. (Sort of like they do with Medicare and Medicaid. Ok, now you can laugh.) Seriously, that kind of money would need to be watched and and watched closely. In other words, the UN will have to be kept out of the loop entirely.

Want to really earn that Nobel Peace Prize, Chairman Obama ? Here's your chance.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Torching Civil Liberties

War has been declared on civil rights in the United States.

No, we're not talking about the right to put a Crucifix in a jar of urine or losing the right to contact al Qaeda whenever one's in a jihadist mood without the government eavesdropping.

We're actually losing our very right to exist as free Americans thanks to the Obamacareless plan that the liberals wish to inflict upon the United states. Under their fraudulent attempt at "reform", the government will have the power to toss you in jail if you choose not to go along with their little scam. Either you have health insurance or you're paying a fine. Can't pay the fine ? You're going to prison. Isn't it great how these liberals have no problem whatsoever in throwing hard working Americans in prison for refusing to go along with the liberals' plan and yet wring their hands in angst about a terrorist who was allegedly roughed up by Navy SEALS ?

Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore. The People's Republic of Kansas, maybe, but certainly not Kansas.

If the liberals' You-Better-Have-Insurance-Or-Else mandate is actually inflicted upon us, a Pandora's box of abuses will open with potentially truly ugly results that may soon follow suit. For example, what if Chairman Obama is channeling Al Snore in one his "green" moods and decides that everyone must drive one of those crappy Smart cars ? After all it's good for the collective, right ? Lowering CO2 emmissions and saving us from an environmental armageddon is everyone's responsibilty, right ? What if Chairman Obama decides everyone must have H1N1 vaccinations ? Isn't controlling this "pandemic" everyone's responsibilty ? What we have here is a recipe for governmental chaos that will make prison riots look organized. Every five minutes some egg headed Harvard graduate will come up with some other mandate that must be followed for the common good. They're the intelligent ones, we're the imbeciles. Well, that's not accurate. We'll be pets and they'll be the benevolent masters.

Jump, America, jump! Oh, good America! Now, c'mon play dead! Good America! Who wants treats ?

Whether you realize it or not, the Senate and House versions of Obamacareless are actually single payer health care plans. What difference does it make if insurance comapnies exist if they're being run by Uncle Sugar ? If everyone must buy insurance and it that industry is the iron grip of the federal government, what's the difference between this scam and the single payer scam ?

Easy. No one in single payer countries are thrown in the pokey for not going along with the program.

Our civil liberties are going to burn and we have our friends in Congress lighting the match.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

The Racist Cat Is Out Of The Bag

In the soon to be released book Game Change written by Mark Halperin and John Heilman, our less than illustrious Imperial Senate Majority Leader Harry "I Surrender" Reid was quoted as having said that Barack Obama did not have a "[black] dialect unless he wanted to have one" and that Obama was popular because he's "light skinned."

Let me be the first on the right to say it: Time to resign, Harry.

In case you're suffering from post concussion syndrome, let me remind you: I am no fan of Obama or his Marxist philosphies. Frankly, I think he's the worst President we've had and that includes a certain peanut farming antisemite from Georgia, but even I am completely and totally outraged by this blatantly racist remark from Reid. This is a clear example of the not-so hidden racism that lurks in the heart of the Democratic party.

A quick history lesson is in order here. Who started the genocide against the Native Americans ? A Democrat you may have heard of named Andrew Jackson. Who stood in the way of the abolition of slavery ? You guessed right, the Democrats. Who threw Americans of Japanese descent into internment camps ? Could it be the...Democrats ? Who fought tooth and nail against ending segregation in the South ? I know! I know! It was the Democrats! See a trend here ?

The bottom line is jerks like Harry Reid use their uber leftist views to hide their obviously racist views. A good example of this is school vouchers. Isn't it swell how people like Hillary Clinton sent her kid to private school but did her best to keep vouchers out of the hands of the common (let's face it, poor black) folks who simply wanted a better education for their kid ? Hypocrites like Clinton don't have to come right out and say it--they want to keep blacks where they are and out of their schools. Same thing can be said about every other initiative the socialist left has come up with. Welfare, affirmative action, Section 8 housing, etc., all of these programs were designed to keep minorities, mainly blacks, in their place.

And yet, us Conservatives are the racists ?

To be real a Conservative, you have to believe in the oneness of America. All of us "extremists" don't see color, we see fellow Americans. No, we don't believe in handouts to right some un-rightable wrong, we believe in giving every American his God given right to an opportunity to be the very best person he can be. What he does with that opportunity is his own business. No one is going to hold anyone else's hand or make excuses for those who throw away that precious opportunity. If someone wants to be a pot smoking telemarketer, so be it. If someone wants to create his own multi media internet empire and be a world famous columnist, so be it. Our firm belief in God given opportunity is what seperates Conservatives from the racist liberals who'd rather give pocket money to minorities to keep them off their manicured lawns. Given that undeniable logic, who do you think is really fighting for the little guy ?

I'll give you a hint: It isn't jerks like Harry Reid, that's for damn sure.

Counterterrorism For Dummies

Normally I'd skewer Janet From Another Planet Napolitano, Chief of Homeland Lack of Security and NCTC head Michael On Vacation Leiter for their idiocy, but I'm going to show a little Christian mercy. Sure, they fumbled the ball on the Skidmark Bomber on Christmas Day and exposed the people of Detroit to untold horrors, but it's just too easy to make fun of these jokers. It's like shooting paralyzed fish in a barrel. (Are we even allowed to say paralyzed anymore ? Is it disabled ? Movement deprived ?)

Rather than come up with a bunch of snarky remarks, I've decided to give them a few ideas to fix our failing counter terrorism efforts. After all, Chairman Obama isn't going to fire them. (He reserves that right for evil capitalist CEO's.)

The first step in fixing our laughable counter terrorism efforts is developing common sense. The last time I checked, we are not at war with little old grandmothers from Peoria, we're at war with lunatics from the Middle East. No matter how politically incorrect it is, we need to double check folks from garden spots like Sudan, Libya, Palestine, Iran, and any country that has the word "-stan" in its name. Now I know it may ruffle a few feathers, but too bad. This isn't racism, this is being rational. We have borders for a reason. No foreign national has the right to enter the United States, it's a privilege that can denied for any reason. (Like being a member of al-Qaeda, for example.)

One great way to derail these plots is to require foreign nationals from terror breeding grounds is to require that they apply for a US Travel Request six months in advance. During that time, DHS can run a very thorough background check. (Where are they going to get the manpower to do this ? With 10% unemployment, there's more than enough people with plenty of time on their hands.) Now, this background check isn't free. There will be a fee paid by the applicant, helping to defray the cost. (Wow! A government plan that pays for itself! Whoulda thunk it ?) The background check would cost $5000-$15000, and the fee would not be waived for any reason.

While these folks are in the States, they would have to report to DHS once per day and wear a bracelet that provides GPS info on their whereabouts, sort of like the ones used for house arrest. Of course, these foreign nationals could leave their hotels, but we need to know where they're going and what they're doing. Is this an invasion of the foreign nationals' privacy ? ABSOLUTELY. However, they are not American citizens and the Constitution does not apply to them, no matter what the ACLU and Chairman Obama think. If they don't like it, they don't have to come to the US.

Wouldn't be great if our federal government's endless bureaucracy was inflicted on someone else other than American citizens ?

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

The Failed Jock Known As Olbermann

Normally, I wouldn't waste ten seconds of my life responding to anything Keith Olbermann says, but ol' Failed Jock said something on his program (you know, the one with six viewers) that I'm not going to let slide. In one his nonsenseical rants, the Failed Jock whined about a Neal Boortz comment that went something like this:

"Obamacare will do more damage than a sucessful terrorist bombing and will kill more people as well."

Now, I'm not going to defend Neal Boortz. He's got a big mouth and a big megaphone and needs no help from me, your humble Right Wing Extremist columnist. Not only that, but Boortz's statement happens to be fairly mild, (and true) compared to some of the other things he's said in the past. No, it isn't Boortz's comment that's a big deal, it's the Failed Jock's comments that drew me to my keyboard like a government worker to a bloated pension.

The Failed Jock rhetorically asked what would Boortz do if terrorists killed 45,000 people a year and compared those who oppose the federal government's takeover of our health care plans to terrorists.

"What would you do if terrorists killed 45,000 Americans a year in this country ?" cried the Failed Jock and then he went on to claim that insuarnce companies are "killing 45,000 people a year".

Why on God's green (and not to mention cooling) earth is NBC paying this dork over 7 million dollars a year ? I'm not one who judges other people's salaries, but give me a break. This isn't just overheated partisan rhetoric, this is an outright lie. There is no way to judge how anyone has ever died from a lack of insurance. There is no formula. There is no statistical marker for this. And, for the record, more people with insurance die than without, since 85% of Americans have insurance. It's like saying insurance is bad for your health. It's that stupid.

Political rhetoric is fine. (Hey, I intend to make a career of it.) Lies that insult everyone's intelligence are not.


One thing you have to love about politics is the slogans. You know, like "Silent Majority", "Morning In America", and "Ein Volk, Ein Reich, Ein Fuhrer" (Just wanted to see if you were paying attention.)

Well, we here at Absolutely Nobama want to be a part of this fine tradition, too. Ladies and gentleman, I give you the first political slogan of the new decade (Drum roll, please....) I give you: OBAMACARELESS!

Why do I call our new health care scam...I mean, health care plan, Obamacareless ?


It's going to bankrupt our country...and Obama could care less.

It's not even remotely Constitutional...and Obama could care less.

No one, left or right, remotely thinks this is a good idea...and Obama could care less.

It's going to ration care...and Obama could care less.

It's going to raise taxes at the ABSOLUTELY worst possible time...and Obama could care less.

It's going to drive millions out of work...and Obama could care less.

It's turning our beloved Republic into a socialist state...and Obama could care less.

It's the biggest government boondoggle in world history...and Obama could care less.

It's the worst law ever written since the Nuremberg Laws...and Obama could care less.


So folks, do we have a winner ? Is Obamacareless the next big political slogan or what ?

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Subject A &B

I'd like to introduce you to two of my friends: Subject A and Subject B. They will be the illustration of what's wrong Barack Obama's wealth redistribution vision of America.

Subject A was born to a middle class family. Subject A wasn't the brightest or the most athletically gifted person around. He was a likable fellow who always gave it his all. He didn't really have the grades or the self discipline required for college, so he joined the military. After his hitch in the service was done, Subject A buckled down, got a college degree, married his high school sweetheart, and became a solid, taxpaying citizen.

Subject B grew up in the same neighborhood as Subject A. Subject B, however, was a lazy good for nothing. He dropped out of high school and never bothered to get a GED. He lived at home mooching off his mother. He fathered two chidren out of wedlock with two different women. Subject B became an alcoholic and a Meth addict. When Subject B wasn't in jail, he was on welfare, as his mother had enough and threw him out.

So tell me, Chairman Obama, why does Subject B have any right to any of Subject A's wealth ?

That comparison illustrates what's wrong with Chairman Barack Obama's "spread the wealth around" mentality. According to the Declaration of Independence, both were created equal, but each used his equality differently. Subject A made something of himself and Subject B did not. Subject A wasn't born into wealth. He wasn't blessed with any special talents. He was simply a plugger, your everyday working stiff that liberals like Obama have decided has enough to spare to give to Subject B, who is an obvious victim of an unfair capitalist society.

Call me crazy and off my meds, but I'm certain this is not what The Founding Fathers had in mind.

Liberals like to believe they're helping the Subject B's of the world, but like everything else they do, they drop the ball, mostly on the heads of the Subject A's of the world. Take the Obamacareless debate, for instance. Subsidies for health insurance will be paid for the Subject B's of the world out of Subject A's pocket. Why ? If Subject B can't pay for his own insurance, isn't it his own fault ? No one forced Subject B to drop out of high school. No one held a gun to his head when he took he took that first hit of Meth. Subject B ignored Donna Shalala's advice on a certain private activity and wound up with children he couldn't afford. Is that Subject A's fault ? Is Subject A really greedy when he grumbles about having to pay higher insurance premiums and higher taxes for human wastes like Subject B ?

Now to be certain, there are truly those who can't take of themselves, and we as a Judeo-Christian society have a God-given responsibility to take care of them through charity. That's right, good old fashioned, politically incorrect, Bible-thumping, Jesus-loving, and Talmud-quoting charity. Every American has a moral responsibilty in this endeavor. It isn't like Joe Biden's "paying taxes is patriotic" lunacy, but it's the real-deal Judeo-Christian "Love thy neigbor" stuff that gives liberals nosebleeds. The American people don't need to have a gun put to their heads to be charitable. By far and away, the American people are the most charitable people on the face of God's green (and not mention cooling) earth. (To be fair, there are plenty of Islamic and other non Judeo-Christian charities as well. Last thing I need is to be charged with a hate crime for failing to be tolerant.)

You want a solution to the health care problem, Chairman Obama ? Want to fill the 36 trillion dollar hole Medicare and Medicaid have dug themselves into ? How about creating a 100% tax deduction for donations that go to taking care of the truly sick and hey, why not, the Subject B's of the world. As in: you donate 1 million dollars, you take 1 million dollars off your taxes. Major corporations, you know the ones you demonize on a daily basis, would be falling all over themselves to help out. So would the Subject A's of the world that you seemingly have the utmost contempt for. Only they're doing it out of a sense of humanity, not some half baked, socialist utopian ideals dreamed up at Berkley or in some has been European country.

All of us Subject A's need you off our backs, Presidente.

The Black Hole Known As Government

Before our illustrious Imperial Senate begins its "investigation" of the failed Underwear Bomber attack in Detroit, I'd like to hand over the real culprit of the caper:

The Black Hole Known As Government.

Yes, like one of those looney tune Truthers, let me be the first to officially blame the the whole Underwear Bomber affair on the federal government. No, I don't think it was distract us from the Obamacareless debate, nor do I believe it was intentionally done, so we can be dragged into a war. (I may be fat, but I'm not the Right's answer to Michael Moore.) No, once again, just like every problem we've had since the beginning of the 20th Century, this problem was caused by a federal government that has become a black hole--a tear in the space/time continuum. Now, unlike the black holes in space, this black hole sucks up money and common sense into a place so dense nothing can escape.

I don't really think at this point we can blame one person. There's too much blame to go around. That's because, like a black hole in space, the federal government has gotten so big and destructive, one can not honestly just blame one person for this foul up. For example, Chairman Obama, like an automaton, blamed his predecessor Bush, claiming the security system we have in place was four years old and it was something he inherited. (Hmmm...Where have we heard that before ?) The Democrats quickly blamed Jim DeMint, who held up the confirmation of Obama's head of the TSA, Erroll Southers, who wanted the TSA workers to unionize. It's sort of like a game of "telephone" that doesn't end when you get to the end of the room, it ends when another 3000 Americans die needlessly.

The bottom line is this: A mistake was made because the government has become massive. The left hand doesn't know what the right hand is doing. When bureaucracies become so ridiculously massive, agencies can't coordinate their efforts. That's obvious because The Underwear Bomber's own father ratted him out in Nigeria and yet, our impotent government did nothing. The NSA intercepted al-Qaeda communicades about using a Nigerian man for an attack---umm....Hello, Mcfly! The worst part of it is, Abdulmutallab was already on a terror watch list!

How much longer until we're all sucked in ?