Thursday, June 3, 2010

Absolutely Nobama: The Game!

I'm feeling incredibly frisky and playful, like a Progressivevik at a Flag Burning.

Therefore, I decided, as Fringe-Extremist-In-Chief of Absolutely Nobama, we are going to play a little game. This is my favorite game as the winners are always the American people and the losers are always Chairman Obama's Big Mommy regime in Soviet controlled--er, uh, Progressivevik riddled,Washington, DC.

The name of this game is: FACT.

Don't worry. This game has no small pieces for the kiddies to choke on, and no, it's not the latest video game that will suck you into a vortex of addiction that's worse than heroin, so there will be no need for an investigation by Congress. The only thing you need to do to play this game (and win) is think.

Shall we begin ?

Chairman Obama sent more troops to Haiti (10,000) than he did to the Border (1200). FACT!

Under Chairman Obama's careful watch, we've had two sucessful terrorist attacks on US soil. (The Arkansas Army Recruiting Station Shooting and Nidal Hassan's rampage at Fort Hood.) FACT! Only Divine Intervention stopped the Christmas Day Skidmark Bomber and The NYC Car Bomber. (OOPS! I forgot! It's unpoliticalcorrecthink to mention God. Sorry. Enough with the rat mask, already. Do it to Julia!)

Now, the above are indisputable Facts. If you were to ask any FOX personality, like Glenn Beck, Bill O'Reilly, or Greta Van Susteren, they would concur, since they are FACTs. If you were to pump truth serum into Rachel Maddcow, Chrissy Matthews, and The Human Rat Keith Olberman, the would be chemically compelled to agree. Got it ? You do ? Great! You get one point for every dollar the Big Mommy Regime owes in unpaid liabilities.

The score is : 100 trillion you, Chairman Obama and the Big Mommy Regime: zilch.

Ready for the Bonus Round ? Here's the kicker! If you get this one wrong, you lose. What's that ? That's unfair ? I'm making up the rules as I go along, you say ? I'm wounded! Why, making up the rules as I went along would be terribly dishonest, like using a scandal ridden former President to offer a job to a Congressman so he would drop out of his primary race against a key political ally. We don't operate like that here at Absolutely Nobama. However, for the good of the collective, so we could give everyone a chance to win, we threw out the old rules that were written 234 year ago by a bunch of old white guys who wore wigs. Oh, yes, yes. The question is ADA compliant. Even those with limited mental facilities, like a certain gaffe-prone Vice President have a shot at getting it right.

Ready ?

For all the points and the game: Is it racist to point out the above FACTS ?

(I'm not very computer savvy, so feel free to hum the Jeopardy song.)

Oh, I'm sorry. The answer is yes, according the 30+ leftist groups that have that have written to the FCC demanding that "hate speech" (AKA FOX News, Conservative talk radio, and internet journalists like myself.) be monitored. You lose, report to Room 101!


On May 7, 2010, a coalition of 30+ leftist groups have sent a letter to the FCC demanding that they monitor "hate speech" in the media. Here's some lowlights from the letter, written by Jessica Gonzalez of the National Hispanic Media Coalition, the lead socialists in this matter. ("NHMC")

"As NHMC has awaited Commission action, hate, extremism, and misinformation have been on the rise,and even more so in the past week as the media has focused on Arizona's passage of one of the harshest pieces of anti-Latino legislation in this country's history, SB 1070." (Like, oh, I don't know, accurately stating SB 1070 is just a weaker version of the federal law already on the books.)

"Many communities and individuals do not have the information they want and need to intelligently engage in our democracy." (Gotta love that elitist attitude.)

"Studies show that media consolidation diminishes ownership opportunities for people of color and lead to less diversity of voices; this yields a media in which people of color are under and misrepresented." (Apparently, Oprah Winfey, Whoopi Goldberg, Geraldo Rivera, Juan Williams, just to name a few, are now unpersons who have fallen off the face of the ever-cooling earth. Gee, who does that sound like ? Give up ? Mark Lloyd, Chairman Obama's FCC "Diversity czar".)

"In this same atmosphere, hate speech thrives, as hate has developed as a profit-model for syndicated radio and cable television programs masquarading as 'news.' " (Who could Ms. Gonzalez be referring to here ? Rush Limbaugh ? Beck ? Levin ? Hannity ? Those who actually, pardon my use of a tired phrase, speak truth to power ?)

"The Internet gives the illusion that news sources have increased, but in fact there are fewer journalists employed now than before." (FOX News doesn't seem to have that problem. Neither does the Wall Street Journal. No layoffs at the Daily Caller to report. It seems to me that only the Progressivevik rags like the New York Times, The Miami Herald, The Boston Globe, and others like them are in trouble. I'm a happy man when "journalists" like Susan Roesgen, formerly of CNN, who got herself canned for screaming at a Tea Party protester, join America's 9.9% unemployed.)

"Moreover, on the Internet, speakers can hide in the cloak of anonymity, emboldened to say things they may not say in the public eye. Even worse, sometimes anonymous Internet speakers hold their information out as news, leaving the public with a difficult job of discerning fact from fiction." (Full disclosure: I originally wrote this column under my pen name, Anthony Digiorgio. Call me crazy and off my meds, I thought the government would retaliate against me by having the IRS audit me every five minutes or put me on the "no-fly" list. Now, I'm no longer afraid. My given name is Alan Louis Levy. So there. As far as the truth goes, remember the FACT game we just played ? Not for nothing, I've said it many times: If Big Mommy shuts down the Internet, I'll write my column by hand it nail it to a tree.)

"The current media landscape is ridden with false, misleading, divisve and dehumaizing language, some of which actually rises to the level of violence." (By golly, the NHMC is right! Keith Olbermann should not have called citizens who oppose Obamacareless selfish nor should he have called George W. Bush a war criminal. Yes, the Internet can inspire some to violence. Just ask Nidal Hassan who his Facebook buddies were. Let's not forget those G-20 riots in Pittsburgh!)

"To be clear, the NHMC is not asking -and will not ask- the Commission to compose any sort of content regulations pertaining to hate speech in the media." (Apparently, Ms. Gonzalez has never heard of Regulatory Czar Cass Sunstein. Ms Gonzalez, I'd like to introduce you to my arch-nemesis, Inner Party Member Sunstein. I'm sure the two of you will make beautiful AMSOC music together.)

"Once this information is collected, NHMC et al. will utilize the data for educational, informational, and research purposes. Specifically, NHMC will confront and educate hate distributors about the consequences of hate speech and encourage them to self regulate. (Reread the last quote repeatedly and ask yourself this question: How creepy is this ?)

"Since NHMC filed its petition in early 2009, hate, extremism, and misinformation have been on the rise." (That's totally true. Free Gaza just tried to ram a flotilla through Israel's legal and totally justifiable blockade. The Homicidal Muppet Kim Jong Mentally Ill just sank a South Korean navy ship. Nidal Hassan used Ft. Hood as a private shooting gallery. Again, let's not forget the G-20 riots.)

We could go on and on, as this Jessica Gonzalez likes to repeat herself, and I, like you, can only take so much of this. The moral to this sad little tale is this: We must guard our liberties. We must protect and cherish them, because once they're gone, they're gone for good. Free Speech is the backbone of America. We must fight tooth and nail against people like the NHMC who want to take that precious right away. I may think the HuffingtonandPuffington Post may be wrong 99.85% of the time. I may think Ed Schultz is a bleeding imbecile. I may wish Rachel Maddcow would quit mooing. But never, ever, would I expect the government to shut them down. I respect their right to be idiots. In fact, I'll go to my grave defending their right to be idiots. We The People believe in Free Speech. They The Progressiveviks do not.

God help us all.

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