Sunday, June 19, 2011

Observing Animals In Their Natural Habitat

In the course of my research for this column, I visit many leftist websites. (If my laptop were ever to fall into the wrong hands, I would probably look like a communist spy.) Often, these sites are very, very dull, like Al Snore on downers.
However, there is a lot that can be learned from reading the user comments. After all, the best way to study animals is to observe them in their natural habitat. Let's see Liberalius Schmuckius in action at the Moveon.Dork Preserve for Mentally Ill Moonbats.
(As is our custom: All spelling and grammatical errors are left in for effect.)

"It would be nice if you would go back to editing the Paul Revere entry on Wikipedia to cover Sarah Palin's stupidity. That way you could actually think someone is believing your crap."
"I was at the New York Aquarium recently and I was saddened by what I perceived as marine life subjected to boring and tedious lives."

"bob barker your price is right! sea world and all 'zoos' ( anyplace that puts animals in cages for the sole purpose of human viewing) should be deconstructed NOW who the hell do we humans think we are.. masters/ owners of this planet? we have done a fine job keeping it safe and healthy, haven't we...."
"Society defines property rights. They are not handed down by a mythical god. They are not laws of nature.

Society defines property rights. Right now, the distribution of wealth and income in this country is insane. To claim that the obscenely wealthy are 'productive people (who should) keep what's theirs' is pathetically ludicrous.

When the American people finally get together and decide they've had enough of this 'I'm better than you and I deserve to be rich because I work so hard and I'm so smart and blah blah blah', things will change."

"You're such a fool. You don't have to mention his middle name [Jew Hater Obama] and try to allude that he's Muslim, or somehow non-American, or associate him with Saddam. Racist.
Mega wealthy people in this country (or the world in general) do NOT get rich from 'hard work' and they do NOT deserve the INSANE tax breaks every year. They would be just fine without them, and it's wrong to cut education so the Koch brothers can make another 10 zillion this year!
You are wrong."

Luckily for us, Liberalius Schmuckius doen't have a high birth rate. The females of this species often end their gestation periods early while chanting "2+2=5" and "Speak truth to power!". Not only that, the males seem.....well, not very male-like. (Except for the one known as Anthony Weiner. He'll show his genetalia to any female with a pulse and a Twitter acount.)

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